Be forewarned. The following content will be offensive at some point to whites, blacks, Latinos, Eskimos, the poor, the rich, women, men, Republicans, Democrats, patriots, foreigners, Foreigner fans, and anyone who does not listen to the same voices from inside my head that I do. It may cause dizziness, nail biting, extreme rage, worried looks, diarrhea and vomiting of flammable, green bile. Still with me?
Well, I tried.
I wanted to try to name the blog after Elvira Gulch. She was the woman who terrorized Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz. In Dorothy’s dream, she was the Wicked Witch. Elvira didn’t have magic. She was just a rotten shrew.
In 1982 I read an essay on writing from George Plimpton. His hypothesis was that people want to read from someone who is at least a little bit angry. So everyone should be dying to read every word I write, because it’s been soaked in mayhem, passion and bitter venom. The only serene parts are when I talk about running. I think those are uninteresting, but I keep them in just to show that I’m not a total d!ck.
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